Jumpsuits for shorties

I've never even considered wearing a jumpsuit before. It never even crossed my mind. I mean, I've been aware, for the past year at last, that they are making a comeback, slowly trickling down from the top notch designer labels to the high street, but I always thought they were too 'high fashion' for me.

However, when I saw this beauty of a jumpsuit in this month's Marie Claire, I fell in love with it, and went on to include it in a fashion article I wrote for The Yorker. Whilst researching this article, I began looking for alternatives (at £145 reduced, this is out of the price range of the student target demographic of the piece), and became utterly convinced that I needed a jumpsuit in my life.

And so mission jumpsuit began. I wanted something plain (therefore probably black), sophisticated and elegant. Not being the most slender of people (a generous size 12, and on the short side), I really wasn't convinced that I would find a single jumpsuit that looked good. I knew I wanted something with long legs, rather than a short jumpsuit, as I would be wearing it with heels to make up for what nature forgot to give me (height). Also nothing too flarey in the leg-Aladdin is so last year.

Cue frantic internet research followed by an eventful trip into town (York city centre)

I wasn't overly impressed by Topshop's online offerings; the only one which appealed to me was the 'Premium Jacquard Jumpsuit' and even looking at it online I knew it would be too long for me. Seeing it in store only served to confirm this.

Next stop New Look. Things were looking marginally better. I really liked this halterneck jumpsuit, however, bearing in mind that the model on the internet was 5ft8, I didn't think I stood a chance.

To be honest, just going into Whistles was scary enough (although it was out of my price range, I wanted to try the Camille jumpsuit anyway, for comparison-and if anyone reading this was wondering what to get me for Christmas...) I'd never been in there before and imagined it as the Devil-Wears-Prada of the retail industry, with immaculately presented sales assistants looking down their noses at my Primark handbag.

Into town I trotted, first stop Whistles. Deep breath and in I go. Unfortunately for my wardrobe (but perhaps fortunately for my nerves), they didn't seem to have the Camille jumpsuit in stock (and I wasn't hanging around to ask). They did however, have a similar jumpsuit, but in a deep red and with a  halterneck collar. It was lovely, but one look at it told me that it wouldn't fit-the legs were up to my boobs! Cue quick exit from Whistles and onto New Look.

Despite several playsuits, the only jumpsuit I could find in New Look told me in one glance that it would be too long again. I had the same problem in every shop I went in, I didn't need to try them on to know that they would be too long. One day I will venture into town again and try some playsuits, but Christmas shoppers got the better of me on this particular trip.

Mission Jumpsuit: failure.  So if any buyers/designers for High Street stores are reading this, here's something for your 2012 to do list: Jumpsuits for shorties.



PS. Can someone explain to me why 'jumpsuits' are categorized under 'dresses' on the websites of several fashion retailers? I understand that they are alternatives to each other, but so are skirts and trousers and you rarely see those categorised together.

Zookeeper (Coraci, 2011)

*SPOILERS GALORE*

From the release of the first trailers for this film, it was either going to be really good, or really, really bad. There were mixed reviews about it; some people had said it "wasn't great", but they didn't say it was terrible, so a mountain of turkey sandwiches and some pig-awful Boxing Day TV later, I found myself sitting down to watch Zookeeper.

I had two big issues with the opening scene:

• He was batting WAY above his average with her
• WHY would you not want to marry a zookeeper? I would. Not necessarily that particular one, but if the right zookeeper came along...

So yes, a few dodgy hits in the opening scene, and I was dreading what was to come, but I was pleasantly surprised. It may not have the strongest storyline or the most convincing characters, but it is an entertaining way to wile away a lazy couple of hours. There are several throwbacks to Dr Dolittle, and even King Kong, with a the gorilla heroically climbing his way to the top of a bridge to let the zookeeper get the girl. The plot was highly predictable from about 10 minutes in, but so are most Disney films, and people don't complain about them.

Had my stomach not been lined with a couple of cheeky glasses of Buck's Fizz, I may not have been so keen, as I normally can't stand unrealistic films with animals talking and whatnot (my imagination is not as elastic as it used to be), but it managed to raise a few laughs, which is all you need on a lazy Boxing Day.

Ways in which I've grown up in 2011*

• I wasn't excited about Christmas this year-this means I now have a mental age of more than 8
• I wasn't excited about the post-Christmas sales this year-I now have a mental age higher than a teenager
• I've spent more money on food than I have on clothes
• I've spent more money on alcohol than I have on clothes food
• I didn't have an advent calendar this year
• I finally learnt to eat pizza the proper way, rather than crusts first
• I now understand some of the jokes on The Inbetweeners
• I know what some of the buttons on the washing machine do.
• I now know that you don't have to spend money EVERY time you go in Disney Store (although I still tend to make up for it on alternate occasions)

*Mentally/emotionally only; physically, I'm the same 5ft1 I was at the start of 2011